5 thực hành đã giúp phục hồi Long Covid của tôi

Nhiễm trùng vòi trứng : ngày 5 tháng 9 năm 2021
Các triệu chứng : Mệt mỏi, sương mù / áp lực não, tim đập nhanh, nóng bừng, buồn nôn, da nhạy cảm, chóng mặt, tức ngực, ù tai.
Tiến trình chữa bệnh : Sự cố vào cuối tháng 9, giữa tháng 10 năm 2022 (80%), tháng 4 năm 2022 (gần 100%).

Bệnh tật, tàu lượn siêu tốc, thử thách, suy sụp, đổ vỡ - tất cả những thuật ngữ có thể mô tả chính xác bảy tháng qua của tôi với Long Covid. Rất ít thứ trong cuộc sống có màu đen và trắng, và kỳ lạ thay, điều này thậm chí đúng với tình trạng suy nhược. Không ai xung quanh nghĩ rằng 'này, tôi khá thích phiên bản dài của Covid nếu có thể', nhưng sự thật là tôi luôn học được điều gì đó có giá trị khi bị đẩy đến giới hạn của mình. 'Bạn trưởng thành qua những gì bạn phải trải qua,' như một người bạn cùng khổ với Long Covid nói với tôi, người dù đã trải qua hai năm đấu tranh, nói rằng cô ấy đã rút ra được kinh nghiệm. Tôi không có ý coi thường sự đau khổ của Long Covid, bởi vì có quá nhiều đau khổ, quá nhiều đau khổ, nhưng tôi nghĩ cũng sẽ là một lời nói dối nếu không có gì tốt đẹp có thể đến từ nó. Long Covid dạy tôi sống chậm lại, nó dạy tôi chăm sóc cơ thể mình tốt hơn, nó dạy tôi cải thiện chế độ ăn uống của mình và có lẽ quan trọng nhất là nó nhắc nhở tôi rằng tôi sở hữu những công cụ để chữa bệnh. Dưới đây, tôi tập trung vào những điều tự nhiên đã thúc đẩy sự phục hồi của tôi đi đúng hướng. Tất cả chúng ta đều cần tìm con đường chữa bệnh cho riêng mình và tôi hiểu có những mức độ bệnh tật khác nhau, nhưng tôi hy vọng có một số thông tin chi tiết ở đây có thể mang lại hy vọng cho ai đó đang cảm thấy ốm yếu và cô đơn.

1. TÌM HIỂU GIỚI HẠN CỦA TÔI

Tình trạng nhiễm trùng Covid ban đầu của tôi cũng giống như nhiều người khác - tôi cảm thấy khó chịu trong vài ngày, sau đó bớt thô bạo hơn một chút và sau đó sức khỏe trở lại nhanh chóng. Cảm thấy khá ổn (80%), tôi tiếp tục cuộc sống mà không cần suy nghĩ nhiều về việc mình đã sẵn sàng hay chưa. Trước đây, tôi đã từng bị cảm lạnh và bốc hỏa trở lại, vì vậy tôi cũng đối xử với Covid như vậy. Tuy nhiên, Long Covid lại có những kế hoạch khác. Hai sự cố lớn vào cuối tháng 9 và giữa tháng 10 khiến tôi thấy rõ ràng là tôi không thể vượt qua sự cố này. Tôi chợt nhớ về điều này - nói chuyện điện thoại với bố trong nước mắt và nhận ra rằng cuộc sống của tôi sẽ không còn như vậy trong một thời gian dài. Những giọt nước mắt đã chữa lành cho tôi một chút, nhưng bố tôi cũng đưa ra những lời khuyên có giá trị nhất về sự hồi phục của tôi. Anh ấy nói:

• "Jo, bạn cần để cơ thể bắt kịp với bộ não của bạn"

Đây là một vài trong số những bài thiền mà tôi đã thích:

Thiền chữa bệnh: Chữa lành cơ thể một cách tự nhiên: Thiền chữa bệnh có hướng dẫn mạnh mẽ để giảm đau và ngủ (4K) - YouTube

Thiền thở ngắn: Bài Tập Thở Trong 5 Phút - Thiền Chánh Niệm Có Hướng Dẫn 4K - Giảm lo âu bình tĩnh - YouTube

Thiền chữa bệnh luân xa: Thiền có hướng dẫn - Cân bằng luân xa - Căn chỉnh luân xa - YouTube

Thiền chữa bệnh PMS: Làm dịu cơn đau trong thời kỳ kinh nguyệt của bạn với phương pháp thiền có hướng dẫn này của nhà tâm lý học lâm sàng (Thiền PMS) - YouTube

2. GIỮ TRÁI TIM CÒN SỐNG

Là một nhà báo và nhà văn hài kịch, có những công việc tôi làm miễn phí vì tôi thích nó - và có những công việc tôi không thích lắm, vì vậy họ cho tôi tiền để xoa dịu nỗi đau. Những ngày đầu hồi phục, tôi dừng hầu hết công việc vì quá mệt. Cả hoạt động tinh thần và thể chất đều bị tổn thương. Tuy nhiên, tôi vẫn tiếp tục thực hiện ý tưởng phim sitcom với đối tác viết của mình và chúng tôi thường gặp nhau trên Zoom để động não. Tôi quá ốm để nghĩ về điều đó vào thời điểm đó, nhưng tôi nghĩ đây là cách tôi giữ kết nối với trái tim và mục đích của mình. Tôi không đơn độc trong suy nghĩ này, rằng giữ cho trái tim sống sẽ giúp chữa lành. Ngay sau đó, một bác sĩ châm cứu đã nhìn thẳng vào mắt tôi và nói rằng 'bạn phải tiếp tục viết từ trái tim.' Tôi nghĩ anh ấy đúng - điều đó cho phép tôi tiếp tục kết nối với nơi hạnh phúc của tôi, nơi sáng tạo của tôi, nơi ngớ ngẩn của tôi, điều đó chỉ tốt cho sự hồi phục của tôi. Cái nàyBMJ blog is an interesting read which discusses the potential role of art in alleviating discomfort and aiding rehabilitation. (but please read my blog first, it’s more personable and less medical-sounding).

Developing a sitcom is not the only way I connected to my heart. I never used to understand it when people banged on about how ‘great!’ music was, I was like ‘get a room, it’s just sound.’ I get it now. When there’s a potent mix of panic and sickness flooding the body, music provides some healing. It soothes, it distracts — I like to think it’s a love note from one person’s heart to another. Robert Gupta talks about the healing power of music here. On a similar note, I also found Long Covid gave me a real need to vocalise myself. I would randomly burst into song as I walked around the house, singing my little heart out. Singing almost instantly made my symptoms feel better — and on more energetic days I would sometimes add in some booty shaking. And as a comedy writer, I should probably not forget to mention the powerful heart that beats in comedy and the healing of laughter. Singing, dancing and laughing — were all ways I could disrupt a negative energy cycle and bring myself into a place of faith and calm.

3. THE RIGHT DIET

Diet played an absolutely vital part in my healing. Straight after infection, I just wanted to eat everything (and I indulged that). A few months later, I really entered the world of healthy eating. This came easier for me as I had a mother on standby to feed me homemade soup for a few months, but I made sure to continue healthy habits when I moved out. A lot of this came quite naturally to me, but it was also a case of reading information in support groups and following more acupuncture advice (acupuncturists are going to take over the world, mark my words). Dieticians would be helpful too though, but often people in alternative medicine have crossover skills/qualifications. What seemed to especially help me were turmeric and black pepper teas (you need the black pepper for the tumeric to work its magic), oily fish, sweet potatoes, stews, soups, porridge, basically if it was boring and wet — I ate it. Oh and I craved salt. There’s lots of talk about anti-inflammatory, anti-histamine and fasting diets amongst Long Covid sufferers, but I always felt that a general healthy diet — and not being stupid — was probably the best path for me. This meant no alcohol, caffeine, chilli and a limited intake of sugar. Fun times.

I don’t really want to get into the weeds of vitamins because I have read that almost every vitamin on earth can be good for Long Covid, and most of the time this information just stressed me out and made me poor in Holland & Barrett. However, supplements that seemed to work for me are CoEnzyme Q1O, probiotics and cod liver oil. But I ended up buying really good quality ones, because it turns out vitamins can actually have crap in them (bulking agents etc). It’s a scary world out there. Bad vitamins… geez.

4. MOVING TO THE SEA

At the start of 2022, despite still feeling on the rocks, I moved to the seaside. The Victorians used to prescribe periods of rest by the sea and although this might be laughed at now, it has worked for me. It wasn’t long after my move that my recovery shifted up a gear. Having a lungful of fresh sea air and watching the waves soothed my mind, body and soul. On days when my heart was leaping about my body, I would look at the sea and instantly feel calmer. Whilst I am lucky not to have any serious breathing problems, unless I try to run (which I don’t), keeping my lungs full of fresh sea air worked wonders for other symptoms. The headaches went, the fatigue lessened, my sleep deepened. It is just as much about the quality of air than it is the sea, so I think anytime spent somewhere with better air quality is likely to be healing. Doctors no longer prescribe the seaside, but perhaps they should.

5. FINDING ACCEPTANCE

Changing virtually all the main things in my life, including where I live, is hardly a sign of acceptance. For me, acceptance isn’t about doing nothing and waiting to get better, acceptance is the attitude I try to cultivate whilst feeling unwell. Acceptance is knowing I couldn’t control the speed of my recovery and I couldn’t control if I would get better at all. I believe there is deep healing power in truly accepting my present situation.

Part One: Flipping the narrative

There are many different levels of pain and discomfort attached to being human. When you have something like Long Covid, suddenly you are living a life with a much higher level of discomfort. Whilst I never felt like I was in a must-go-to-A&E place of pain, I did feel like some of the sensations I had in my body could make me go mad if they didn’t go away. After mental health struggles in my late 20s, I know the mind can go through horrifying levels of discomfort without anyone requiring a doctor or ambulance. If there is one thing I learnt from this hellish time, it is the power of acceptance. Six months is a long time to be unwell, but I know it would have been longer if I was less familiar with uncomfortable sensations.

I am never going to like pain and discomfort, but I try to frame it in a way that is less conducive to panic. What often happens to me is pain starts out mild, I think negative scary thoughts, enter a fight or flight response and this makes the pain worse. The body clenches in on itself, blood pressure rises, adrenaline spikes, muscles tighten. The mind amps up the pain because it is easy to attach discomfort to danger and damage, and thoughts like ‘am I going to die now?’ One way I try to stop this chain reaction is to associate pain and discomfort with positivity and healing. Pain is my body trying to fix something, create healthier pathways and protect me from getting worse. This isn’t something I just tell myself, I believe it. By creating love and empathy for discomfort, I can sit in unsettling sensations and let the body heal. I believe there are few things more powerful than making peace with your own suffering.

Part two: Why me?

There is another area of acceptance I had to work on and that was accepting I was ill. Really ill. For a bit I naturally rallied against it. I had short covid, not long covid. Then I had medium covid. My ego found it hard to see everyone else bounce back, when my conditions were getting worse. I was generally a physically healthy person and this wasn’t meant to happen to me. But it had. Strangely, or perhaps not so considering what I’ve just written, it wasn’t until I truly accepted I had a long-term condition that my recovery started to speed up. When I accepted this might go on for years, and even return in later life, I made massive strides. Healing works in mysterious ways, eh! When I accepted I was going to have to be careful about how much I work, what I eat, how much I travel, exercise — for a long time — things shifted. It was like I was finally getting the message my body had been trying to send me for months. Slow down. Find gratitude. Make peace with your situation. Maybe I needed to be humbled before I could be healed. I couldn’t manufacture this deep level of acceptance, I needed to really feel it. I needed to embrace the speed of my own healing path and that became easier when I kept connecting with mind, heart, body and soul.

Part three: I’m no fighter

I have refrained from mentioning terms like battle or fight in this piece (except just then). I believe fighting Covid or battling Long Covid, is just the same as saying I am fighting or battling my own body. There are a few theories about Long Covid but one thing that is undeniable is that with Long Covid, the virus and its ramifications are now part of me. If I pour hate and anger on the virus, I am pouring hate and anger against myself. You cannot just pluck the virus out of your cells, out of your body, out of your soul, it doesn’t work like that — you have to work with the virus. One night, during my worst crash, I was lying in bed with this awful brain pressure and it was one of the most horrible brain sensations I’ve ever experienced. Every time I turned my head on the pillow I felt nauseous, I was beginning to lose myself in the panic. I was spiralling. In this place I was angry, raging and every nerve of my body wanted to fight this bastard virus — but then I remembered what happened when I had tried to fight depression… it just got worse and worse and worse. I stopped in the middle of this brain agony, I stopped, I accepted and I sent love to Covid. I just sent love to this thing that was trying to destroy my body, because I realised we were one now. I realised that love was the only thing that would get me through this.

I have told my brain and body I loved it a thousand times since, so many more times than I ever told myself when I was healthy. Because I need to feel this love, I need my body to know it is loved even when it is suffering, broken. I need my body to understand that it doesn’t have to be well to be worthy of my love. It is always worthy of my love. So maybe it’s not just about acceptance, maybe it’s about love too.

THE CONCLUSION BIT:

I am writing this piece because I hope it can be healing for myself and for others. Perhaps even those who don’t suffer from Long Covid can take something from it. Who knows what happens next — I still feel like I am a few mistakes away from relapse — but I have made great strides over the last couple of months and wanted to share the things that have helped me get to this point. Long Covid recovery is not a given.

I also want to include how I have felt since my health has improved. When I was really ill, all I wanted was to be well again. And yet, now I feel better, I have not rejoiced in my health the way I thought I would. I do not leap out of bed with a spring in my step and appreciate all the things I can do. I wish I did, but that’s not the truth. Life was terrible with Long Covid, so hard that I would waste words trying to explain it. I really think you need to go through it to understand. But in a weird way, life was more simple. All I wanted to do was get healthy, and this meant so many of my past desires, concerns, stresses, didn’t matter anymore. I had a single mission — not to feel like crap. There was a lot of comfort in this. As soon as I felt healthy again, I started to take that health for granted. I am now having to face all those issues I put on the backburner. They are heating up full throttle on the front burner and providing their own unique discomfort. Life is still tough, but not as tough.

Because it is true, when you don’t have it, health IS everything. Chronic illness takes away so much, too much. Career and dreams are put on hold, relationships breakdown, peace of mind flies out the window and you no longer feel safe in the world. It is lonely too — because so few people understand. Even loved ones. They aren’t mean, it’s just human nature. With doctors playing catchup, I sought comfort in online communities. There is a lot of helpful information in these, but a word of warning, it can be easy to get terrified by the experiences of others. Limiting my time on support groups helped, and it is important to remember we don’t know anyone’s back story before we start to overly panic. I hope there are breakthroughs with Long Covid — that we understand more about what is going on and there is a cure that works. But in the meantime, one thing I passionately hope, is that people never forget about the healing power already within them.

Love and peace,

Joanna